Dream Diary Volume 4

Dream Diary, Volume 4

Bonus Celebrity Dreams inRed

Straightening Up

My mother calls late at night and says she is coming over with her "new boyfriend". I am in a panic because the house is a mess. I'm trying to make the bed and everything keeps slipping off. I try to shove stuff in the closet, but I can't get the door closed and G--- just looks at me and shakes his head. (top)

Australian Interview

I'm watching an interview show. A man with a moustache is interviewing a very tough Australian man in a biker bar. The Australian is wearing a red beret and is drinking a can of beer. I'm worried about the man with the moustache. He is no match for the Australian. The Australian is becoming angry, giving more and more curt answers. You can see his anger beginning to rise. Finally, the interviewer says something that really offends him. The Australian jumps up, and shouts, "Do you value your moustache?" The interviewer, flustered, says, "What? I--" Australian: "I said, Do you value your moustache, mate?" The interviewer begins to stutter an answer. The Australian says, "Maybe you don't speak English -- I asked you politely if you value your moustache." He then takes out a straight razor and lops off the moustache with two strokes. The interviewer, in shock, pales. He looks straight ahead, blinking a little. (top)

Thelonius Monk

I'm about to be in a big performance. All the performers are gathered at my house, which is a much larger version of my actual house. Carloads of musicians are showing up and I'm trying to get the house in order so I can accomodate all these people. There's trash and clutter everywhere. I'm trying to clean off the steps. People are unpacking their new instruments and leaving packing material around and I'm not sure what's trash and what's not. I'm tryng to maintain order. I go ouside and an open-bed truck pulls up. A buzz goes over the crowd. Someone says, "There he is," and a feeling of awe comes over everyone. Someone says, "It's the Monk." And I realize they're talking about Thelonius Monk. A group of bodyguards, dressed in African garb, come down from the truck, and then Thelonius Monk. He's thin and small and he's wearing a white jacket with red pinstripes. I think he looks incredibly beautiful, and I can't take my eyes off him. He seems to be illuminated from within. His crew go up to get settled in my bedroom. They are obviously the stars of the show. I'm nervous about appearing in a show with such a legend, and having to make him comfortable in my home. I go up to my bedroom. Thelonius Monk and his posse are very annoyed. They think the house is bad and they're angry to be involved in such an obviously amateur production. I feel really hurt. (top)

Duck Eggs

I'm taking care of a duck. She just layed eggs. I'm looking forward to having cute little ducklings. I notice the eggs are gone, and then I see the duck is putting them under water in a swimming pool. I'm in a panic. This is terrible, because if the eggs stay underwater, they will never hatch. I get the eggs and dry them off and now I have to watch them all the time until they hatch. (top)

The Ocean

I'm sleeping. "Wake up," says my husband, "we have to go swim in the ocean." We're nude. "Put this on" (He hands me a robe) "You go first." "No," I say, "someone will see." "No one will see," he says. I go out to the ocean with him and it's very dark. There are large, industrial structures everywhere, huge pipes dumping into the sea and vague, immense shapes. It's very scary. The sea is very rough and there is a strong undertow. "It's too rough," I say. He agrees. We wait for it to get calmer. I'm afraid. A park ranger blows her whistle and shouts, "Line up single file!" A group of people then get in line. She is checking people's ID. Everyone has ID, but they're hand written on ripped out cereal box lids. I give her mine. "Not accepted. Step aside," she says. (top)

A Free Turkey

I'm at dinner with a large family. I won a set of glasses and dishes. I pull them out. They're good crystal with red glass baubles on them. There are champagne glasses and goblets. I keep pulling them out of the crate. There are dessert dishes carved from good red marble. Everyone oohs and ahhs. The mother says, "If we took these on the plane, they would give us a free turkey." (top)

The London Mob

I somehow got involved with a group of people that cheated the London mob. We're in London. A truck backs up -- it's a hijacking. I'm with them when they get caught. They put us in a hospital- like place. One by one they question us, but they really are just torturing us one at a time. I see a woman go down a back stairwell with a group of men and she comes back up beaten and bloody. I think, "I have to get away." I sneak down another set of stairs, but there are a group of men sitting at the bottom talking about the stolen money. Finally, they decide what to do with us. They're going to remove our body parts. There's a little girl there. I'm comforting her. She sits in my lap with a blanket wrapped around her. I'm protecting her. Now we're in a Doctor's office waiting room. The first woman goes in to have her punishment operation. They are going to remove her breast. This is in payment for the lost money. She goes in bravely. I know I have to get away. I find a fire escape and go down the black iron stairs. I'm now in a beautiful, sunny neighborhood in London. People are out watering their gardens. I feel relieved that I escaped, and think that I could start a new life -- get an apartment in that neighborhood. I regret leaving the little girl behind. (top)

The Drunk

I'm in a bar. S--- is a bouncer there. He starts talking to me. We're in a back room. His shirt is open and he's really drunk. I help him to a chair and go to the bar to get him some cold water. There are strange women at the bar. The bartender is an exotic woman. She says who's this for -- that drunk? I want to defend him. Another woman at the bar says, "We're closed for a party." (top)

Jazz Combo

I'm walking down a suburban street. There's a really loud jazz combo playing in one of the backyards and a crowd is gathered on the sidewalk, enjoying it. I say to someone, "I wouldn't want to live next door to that!" (top)

Pyramids

We live in a dump with gigantic pyramids in the backyard. The pyramids have flat tops. I have a notebook with things to do and men's names in it. J--- is here and we're looking at Polaroids of the place. (top)

Bug Killer

I'm swabbing bug killer around the baseboards inside and out with a mop. I spill a huge puddle of it. The chemical smell is unbearable. I try to mop it up with a towel. Someone tells me to throw the towel out. (top)

David Bowie

I'm at a David Bowie concert with M------. It's intermission. The concert is on South Street. We're outside, sitting on a bench. There's about to be a riot on South Street. I'm trying to put my shoes on. We go back in and there's hardly anyone there. We go down to the front row. We're the only people in the first row. David Bowie is setting up. He sits down in an armchair, facing us. He's waiting for it to get more crowded, so he can start his act. He starts chatting with me. I'm having a hard time understanding what he's saying, but I'm flattered. He begins his show. The whole show is David Bowie impersonating his mother in different settings. He's dressed as his mother and he begins a monologue from the armchair. A woman comes out, dressed as a nurse, carrying a small pen knife. During the monologue, she pretends to threaten people with the knife. M---- flips out on her and screams, "Hey, you're poking me!" She's really incensed. David Bowie stops the show and asks if everything is all right. I am embarrassed that my friend wrecked his act. He resumes. The girl comes out again, this time with a bigger knife, and mimes Psycho-style, in front of me, pretending to stab me. I really ham it up with her and pretend to get stabbed and she starts laughing and so does David Bowie. They're really enjoying the fact that I'm playing along. The girl sits down next to me for the rest of the show. There's another little break and then David Bowie comes back out and goes up this big platform where there's a bathtub. We see him from the back as he takes a bath in his mother's white bathing suit. As he bathes, the wet suit becomes more and more transparent until he is practically naked. He's also wearing a Lana Turner style white turban. After the show, I want to go talk to him. I want to give him a Big Mess CD because I think he'll like it. I go to a bar next door and I see the girl (his assistant) from the back. As I approach her, she turns around and it's a young black man, wearing a ski cap low on his forhead, with a scarf around the lower half of his face, so only his nose is showing. He's furious that I'm talking to him and has me escorted out by bouncers. I'm very embarrassed. A guy who was working in the bar comes out and tries to mollify me. I'm pissed off and yell, "DJ King Britt doesn't treat me like that!" (top)

Baby

A baby is sitting on a blanket on the floor. Some one comes in with a vacuum cleaner and spurts out dust all over the place, covering the baby with dust. Some gets into his eyes, and he starts to cry. I pick him up and am comforting him and then his mother comes by and takes him. He starts crying again and says in an adult voice "What happened to all our money?" The mother starts laughing and he says, "Why are you laughing, mommy?" (top)

Bird Mask

I'm saying goodbye to a group of friends at an outdoor festival. I won't be seeing them for a long time. One by one, I kiss them on the mouth and say goodbye. They're all really unhappy to see me go. The last one is a teenage boy wearing a cartoon bird mask. I can tell he's crying behind the mask. He doesn't want me to go. I kiss him on the mouth of the mask and hug him hard and then I finally leave. (top)
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